Singleminded Shopping

Singleminded Shopping

Apples are all you need in life!

Do you have a set list of foods you always buy from the grocery store? I do. There’s always a core of items I’ll buy no matter what: apples, orange juice, rice, soy sauce…I’m sure I should have more variety, but I like what I like.

Still, an all-apple diet probably means you’ll die of malnutrition. Just saying.

Planet Food

Planet Food

Once again pollution and global warming save the day…?

I’m hungry. I’m going to eat popcorn after posting this. But I was wondering…what would the moon taste like? I’m imagining it would be sort of a chalky taste, pretty dry and unpalatable. The earth might taste good, but all the pollution would probably make it horrible. Too bad.

Awkward Food

Awkward Food

Put the chicken back, Pirate.

I had chicken today. It tasted good, but I can’t help but think that if I could see the chicken I was eating post-cooking, I would go vegetarian pretty quick.

Seriously, I feel guilty just thinking about the baby chicks. But food is food? Guilty food, though. Maybe I’ll eat some greens too.

Mouse Meal

It...it was a hungry Christmas.

It…it was a hungry Christmas.

…I apologize for the dark joke right before Christmas. But that’s the quintessential Pirate! If you’re going to eat meat, what’s the difference between mouse and cow? Hygiene, probably.

Anyways, hope your Christmas shopping is going well! Watch out for the crowds and…let the mice live.

Food Choice

Some things just aren't desirable, even if they are edible.

Some things just aren’t desirable, even if they are edible.

I’m gonna level with all of you: I hate mushrooms, and don’t like soup. You’ll never catch me eating bugs. But I do tend to mix up my food in weird combinations. Like soy sauce and dumplings and bagels and cheese fried together with eggs. It’s…really tasty, okay?