Are you tired of the snow yet? I enjoy it, but not all of the time. Speaking of which, I hate holding up my umbrella in the rain or snow. So why not put one on my head? World-changing inventions, here on Pirate Blog.
Monthly Archives: December 2015
Shovel Master
Today I learned I can’t drive in the snow. I made it fifteen feet down the block, got stuck, and didn’t go to work that day. Digging out a car at 4 AM is not fun.
On the other hand, at least I got to shovel my entire driveway. By hand. It’s just one of those days.
Hail Hurt
It’s starting to feel like Christmas…or at least pain. I mean, it’s hailing where I live. That’s sort of like snow…right?
Personally, I could care less about the hail falling on me when I’m outside — it’s the shoveling it that’s gonna suck. And driving in it. Well, at least the hail’s not heavy enough to break any windows.
Yet.
Liar’s Test
It’s funny how children, most of them, can’t lie very well. Actually, a lot of adults can’t lie well either so what am I saying? I guess I’m saying that lying is bad, and you shouldn’t do it. I find running away works a lot better.
Party Down
I’m tired, Christmas is over, and I’ve got work tomorrow. That’s life after all the celebrations. I don’t know about you guys, but imbibing too much eggnog and sugary treats has its comeuppance the next day. I just want to sleep until next Christmas, but I guess it’s time to get ready for the New Year’s.
Good Gifts
Well, Christmas is almost done as I’m writing this. Have you gotten everything you wanted this year? If not, did you have a good time? I’d trade all of my gifts for being with family and having a peaceful night, but I don’t have to. It’s been another good holiday, and I hope you’re all feeling the same.
Mouse Meal
…I apologize for the dark joke right before Christmas. But that’s the quintessential Pirate! If you’re going to eat meat, what’s the difference between mouse and cow? Hygiene, probably.
Anyways, hope your Christmas shopping is going well! Watch out for the crowds and…let the mice live.
Decorating Designation
I like Christmas. I really do. But when it comes to getting a Christmas tree and decorating it…that’s why I have family.
Seriously, if it were just me I’d print out a picture of a tree and stare at it. Well, I’d probably look up a picture of a tree. Really, I’m just in it for the eggnog and presents. Mostly the eggnog. It’s good stuff!